A Bomb in the Lasagna: A Valentine’s Love Note To “Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure”

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Bill & Ted… Wyld Stallyns and I’ve FINALLY other than the movies have a piece of memorabilia (well a t-shirt from LootCrate) oh yeah and let’s not forget the cartoon! So I can now enjoy my favorite Keanu & Little (and one of the Lost Boys) movies as a marathon of sorts plus i’ve got 4 of the 6 of those new comics.

Now if only they would get their asses moving on that 3rd movie I’ve been hearing whispers about (including from their mouths)

Rooster Illusion

SharkWeekBomb-02What makes great art? Is great art that which sticks with you? Is great the movie/ novel/ painting that changes your perspective on life? Is it a work that can provide you with a sense of comfort and home when you’re feeling your worst? If so, then Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure is, without a doubt, great art.

bill & ted poster MGM

Bill & Ted‘s Excellent Adventure has been my favorite movie since I was 10. In the intervening 14 years, I have watched and loved movies that are funnier, more artistically engaging, and if I’m honest, objectively better than Excellent Adventure, but what’s true of romantic love is also true of your favorite movie: it’s what means the most to you more than what’s objectively the best that matters. Of course, it helps that Bill & Ted is actually a truly outstanding movie.

Despite maintaining a following strong enough to warrant a…

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Point Break (2015)

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2015    Pg-13    1 hour & 53 minutes             Action Adventure         ***Luke Bracey & Edgar Ramierz

I’m not sure if you want to call this a reboot but a remake it’s definitely not as even though yes toward the end there are a couple scenes that pay homage to the classic of the 90s original; but aside from that the names (at least) of the 2 main characters remaining the same and the premise while sort of the same (Athlete turned FBI agent etc) it’s different. He’s a Poly athlete (Snow boarding, Motor-cross etc) Johnny Utah is played by an Aussie and we get an adventure (& a trip around the world for the price of a movie ticket!)

I thought to include the old trailer so you could see the difference between the 2. The first mostly centering on surfing…

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Ash vs Evil Dead

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The groovy horror comedy Evil Dead series is now  a 10- 1/2 hour episodic tv series. It will feature the trademark slapstick the  the series is known and loved for.  Star Bruce Campbell in entertainment weekly says they “had to remind Starz that it’s not a straight up horror, and that things can get a little ‘weird’ ” The movies’ original director Sami Rami is back and has directed at least the first episode!

 The demons in the land of Evil Deadlore are speedy and in your face racing to the slaughter. Sam Rami is here to Geek out the Deadite masses with his GOREiously punchy Splatter filled and knowingly cheesy half hour series based on the original 1980s movie series. Bruce Campbell is back as the chainsaw wielding protagonist Ash the accidental hero is called back  to action after unleashing (yet again) a horde of deadites. The show for a…

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THe Man from U.N.C.L.E.

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2015  PG-13  1:56  stars Henry Cavill, Armie Hammer and Hugh Grant

Inspired by the 1960’s  tv series; which I am not even sure I ever saw in my life, so I can’t even base part of my review on that.

CIA operative Napoleon Solo played by Henry Cavill is looking for Udo… whatever the name was, Hitler’s number one scientist. His handler  has him and KGB agent Illya Kuryakin played by Armie Hammer team up  when Russia and U.S. are both threatened by a global crime cartel.  What a pretty green, bright yet melancholy, oh it’s a bathroom and it’s on the color is on the inside too! oooh k (apparently for the drunken bar crawls I guess) Ok, really.. you’re taking a piss AND trying to watch the fight behind you, isn’t that as bad as being on the john and talking on the phone? An hour and 40…

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The Gift

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2015  R  1:48   stars Jason Bateman and Joel Edgerton

Simon’s (Bateman) past comes back to haunt him  when someone from high school approaches him & his wife while out on errands. Moving into a new home and trying to revitalize their relationship, a 20 year old secret looms about.

Joel Edgerton’s creepy character ‘Gordo’ whjo was the weird kid in school. He’s full on creepy and even I got the vibe of a little static Shock compared to an Electrical or lightning strike,that I’d cross the street if i saw him.  Those brown contacts he’s got in may be helping with the creep factor as well. He basically stalks the couple leaving gifts at the house and showing up  without being invited. (And that’s one reason why I hand cashier’s my I.D. to copy or I whisper it to them.

I did like that finally one who has been…

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Spy

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2015    R   1:55   stars Melissa McCarthy, Jason Statham, & Jude Law

Susan Cooper (McCarthy) is an analyst for the CIA down in the basement, She’s pushed into the field to investigate after her partner’s (Law) disappearance

It starts off amusing and then the Kitchen fight which was both pretty good as well as funny! oh Wait did Melissa McCarthy just use a signature WWE move there? It looks like it but can’t think of the name or to who it belongs. Talk about fierce!

A couple of funny lines, even when you aren’t watching & someone else is and enveloped in doing something else and just seems blurted out of nowhere.

One of those favorite lines I mentioned

” I warned you you Swedish gummy fish  Mother F***”

Was better than I thought it would be, not quite a B worthy but definitely C+

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Insidious Chapter 3

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2015  PG13  1:37

This is a prequel to the previous two installments which follows a gifted (more like the) Psychic who helps a tormented teen threatened by a paranormal entity the girl originally thinks is her mom trying to contact her.

Unlike the first movie, this did not feel malicious at all, nor did it have that creepy feel like someone unseen was in the room watching you. The final  shot gives us the ONLY feel of the scary Terror of the original actually gave me a start and made me not want to get off my bed (I knew that first movie would haunt me the rest of my life!! it’s the only ‘recent’ one that has come anywhere close to actually scaring the crap out of me! That red faced demon still sends chills through me!) the rest of the movie was pretty lame and just a ‘haunting’…

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